60 Birthday Jokes



Birthday Gift ~ A Joke?

Tom was talking to his friend at the bar, “I don’t know what to get my wife for her birthday – she has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I’m stuck.”

His friend said, “I have an idea! Why don’t you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way she wants it. She’ll probably be thrilled.” Adam decided to to his friend’s advice.
The next day at the bar his friend said, “Well? Did you take my suggestion?”
“Yes, I did,” Adam replied.
“Did she like it?”
“Oh yes! she jumped up , thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out the door, yelling “I’ll be back in an hour!!”

Ouch!
Poor guy!!
But wayy funny!!

CRITTY’S SHORTS #60 – Critty’s BDAY!


In Dog Years, I'm Dead. Mens T-shirt, Hilarious Funny Over The Hill Mens Shirt


In Dog Years, I’m Dead. Mens T-shirt, Hilarious Funny Over The Hill Mens Shirt



Our Mens T-shirts are made of a fully machine washable cotton blend for a cool, versatile and comfortable fit every time….




















Beistle BL024 Look Who's 60 Blinking Button, 2-Inch


Beistle BL024 Look Who’s 60 Blinking Button, 2-Inch


$3.99


Beistle BL024 Look Who’s 60 Blinking Button. Make sure you have all eyes on you at your 60th birthday party by adding this Look Who’s 60 blinking button to your birthday attire!….

Big Mouth Toys The Big 60! Button (3)


Big Mouth Toys The Big 60! Button (3)


$2.99


Good news: 60 is the new 50. Your 50′s are over and you’re hitting the big 6-0! Wear this button proudly to mark the big event. Great, fun gift for anyone who’s turning 60. 3″ diameter….













Stupid Adult Jokes: Jokes Too Nasty for Kids


Stupid Adult Jokes: Jokes Too Nasty for Kids


$14.39


Stupid Adult Jokes consists of 60 pages of rude, crude, vulgar, and just plain nasty pictures, jokes and riddles that will help you easily think of and laugh about things that should be considered only by adults. This book deserves a place next to the toilet or hidden in a secret location where no faint-hearted creature abides.

Knock Knock Jokes


Knock Knock Jokes


$3.95


Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Isadore. Isadore who? Isadore open or shut? This and 59 other knock-knock gems, incorporating key words that double as preposterous puns, are ready to provide jokesters with all the ammunition they need to regale friends and relatives. Accompanied by 60 engaging illustrations.

Kids' Funniest Jokes


Kids’ Funniest Jokes


$3.95


Hundreds of great one-liners, riddles, knock-knocks, wisecracks, and jokes–each of which was entered in a contest by a kid age 6 to 12–will tickle your funny bone. Plus, all royalties from the sale of this book are being donated by Sterling Publishing to a literacy foundation. 96 pages, 60 b/w illus., 5 3/8 x 8 1/4.

Great Book of School Jokes


Great Book of School Jokes


$3.95


Laugh all the way to class with this fantastically funny collection of riddles, knock-knocks, and goofy stories. Find humor in every subject–even in math–"What did the math classroom have instead of desks? Times tables." Chuckle over history, music, science, gym class, library, recess, show-and-tell–and even going to the nurse or the principal’s office 96 pages, 60 b/w illus., 5 3/8 x 8 1/4.

What You Don't Know about Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


What You Don’t Know about Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


$3.95


What You Don’t Know About Turning 60 is a hilarious pop quiz to ease the pain of a 60th birthday. This charming humor book provides entertainment for over-the-hill birthday parties and is fun to read when the party’s over and reality sets in. Sample jokes include: – Q: What’s a senior screwdriver? A: Orange Juice and Metamucil. – Q: What do the following words bring to mind: "free refills?" A: If you said coffee, you’re probably under 60. If you said a good prescription drug plan, you’re probably 60 or older.

Birthday Tiara 60


Birthday Tiara 60


$4.99


This 60th Birthday Tiara features a silver and purple crown that gives the illusion that real gems are used to give the sparkle and shine. Each 60th Birthday Crown is made of plastic and measures 4 1/2 inches wide x 4 1/2 inches long x 3 inches high.

60 Birthday Yard Sign


60 Birthday Yard Sign


$2.59


“60″ Birthday Yard Sign. Printed on 2 sides. Attached to a 24″ pine stake. Size: 12″ x 15″. Made in USA. All sales final, no returns.

The Big Birthday Hat 60


The Big Birthday Hat 60


$9.99


Our The Big 60 Birthday Hat features a black and white plush hat with a feather boa around the inside and bold candles topping the cake with the words Big 60 in the front. Each 60th Birthday Hat measures 10 inches high x 12 inches wide and may be worn by a male or female at their next milestone birthday bash!

Numerical birthday candle - Pack of 60


Numerical birthday candle – Pack of 60


$66.43


Being in the dollar merchandise business since its beginning, we know what sells, and we are always adding new and different items to our inventory. We are always looking for new items, and we have recently added pet items and craft supplies to our catalog. We design all of the packaging for our items to ensure that categories of merchandise have cohesive matching packaging, and that they are appealing to the eye. Numerical birthday candles are a fun way to display birthdays and anniversary years on cakes or other desserts. Candles are assorted numbers 0-9. Each is white with a red outline. Comes packaged in a blister card with hanging hole. Numbers measure approximately 3 tall. Not a toy. Keep away from children.Dimensions: Length: 9Height: 9Width: 9

Birthday Girl #60 Classic Thong


Birthday Girl #60 Classic Thong


$16.5


Ladies Thong Underwear 5.8 oz. 100% Ultra-fine combed ring spun 1×1 baby rib cotton Size up for a looser fit Super soft high end woven elastic trim Made in the U.S.A. by American Apparel

Birthday Girl #60 3.5 Button


Birthday Girl #60 3.5 Button


$6


Need to say it big and bold? Pin on our oversized button and your message can’t be missed. Support a candidate, play up your passion or make someone smile. Collect ‘em, trade ‘em. Buttons are a fun way to wear and share what’s on your mind. 3.5-inch diameter Metal shell UV-resistant Mylar cover Pinned metal back

Birthday Stripes - 40th Birthday Invitations


Birthday Stripes – 40th Birthday Invitations


$3


These birthday invitations are the perfect way to start a party for someone turning 60. Featuring a blue 4 and a striped 0, these are a very colorful addition to any party. 8 invitations and envelopes per package.

Birthday Stripes - 60th Birthday Invitations


Birthday Stripes – 60th Birthday Invitations


$3


These birthday invitations are the perfect way to start a party for someone turning 60. Featuring a green 6 and a striped 0, these are a very colorful addition to any party. 8 invitations and envelopes per package.

She's So Funny: 1,768 of the Best Jokes from Women Comedians


She’s So Funny: 1,768 of the Best Jokes from Women Comedians


$3.95


No one is more qualified to collect hilarious material from women comedians than funny lady Judy Brown, the author behind the top-selling comedy collections Joke Soup, Joke Stew, The Funny Pages, and Jokes to Go. Brown’s latest humor book, She’s Always Funny, offers the best, biting laughs from both the funniest females performing today and classic women comedians. This comprehensive roundup of hilarious observations and classic bits from women stand-ups is the first of its kind and is alphabetized by subject, from Adoption to Younger Men, so you’ll have no trouble finding the perfect funny quip from a woman’s perspective on hundreds of topics.Don’t cook. Don’t clean. No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum. "My God, the floor’s immaculate. Lie down, you hot bitch." -Joan RiversI don’t need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there’s morning sickness. If I’m going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to achieve that state the old-fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before. -Ellen DeGeneresIn my day there was no pill; it was trick or treat. I had far too many kids. At one time in our playpen it was standing room only. It looked like a bus stop for midgets. It used to be so damp in there we had a rainbow above it. -Phyllis DillerGoing out with a jerky guy is kind of like having a piece of food caught in your teeth. All your friends notice it before you do. -Livia Squires I go running when I have to. When the ice cream truck is doing 60. -Wendy Liebman From With lines from Phyllis Diller, Roseanne, Rosie O’Donnell, Caroline Rhea, Rita Rudner, Janeane Garofalo, Margaret Cho, Whoopi Goldberg, Wanda Sykes, ElayneBoolser, Aisha Tyler, and more, She’s Always Funny delivers the goods from the top women comedians of the last 50 years and offers countless hours of laughter.

Bulk Buys 1st Birthday Whirls - Case of 60


Bulk Buys 1st Birthday Whirls – Case of 60


$306.63


Being in the dollar merchandise business since its beginning, we know what sells, and we are always adding new and different items to our inventory. We are always looking for new items, and we have recently added pet items and craft supplies to our catalog. We design all of the packaging for our items to ensure that categories of merchandise have cohesive matching packaging, and that they are appealing to the eye. 1st Birthday Whirls. Color: blue. Size: 3 4. 5 per package.All sales final no returns.

DDI 952418 1st Birthday Whirls Case Of 60


DDI 952418 1st Birthday Whirls Case Of 60


$307.25


1st Birthday Whirls. Color: blue. Size: 3 4. 5 per package.All sales final no returns.

Great Birthday 60 Luncheon Napkins Pkg/16


Great Birthday 60 Luncheon Napkins Pkg/16


$2.22


Add the Great Birthday 6 Luncheon Napkins to your party list. The Great Birthday 60 Luncheon Napkins are a great addition to your 60th birthday party. The napkins are approximately 6″ wide x 6″ high and are sold in packages of 16.

Great Birthday 60 Basic Party Pack Kit


Great Birthday 60 Basic Party Pack Kit


$15.99


Our Great Birthday 60 Basic Party Pack features black tableware printed with brightly colored birthday candles. Each Great Birthday 60 Basic Party Pack includes tableware for a party of eight, plus party decorations.The Great Birthday 50 Basic Party Pack includes:Great Birthday Dinner Plates (8)Great Birthday 50 Luncheon Napkins (16)Great Birthday 9 ounce Cups (8)Great Birthday Thank You Cards (8)Red 11 inch Bright-Tone Latex Balloons (12)Yellow 11 inch Bright-Tone Latex Balloons (12)Red Curling Ribbon (66 feet)Classic Red 54 inch wide x 108 inch long Plastic Table CoverSchool Bus Yellow Tableware (8 each – knife, fork and spoon)

DDI 1334975 Birthday Candle PDQ Case Of 60


DDI 1334975 Birthday Candle PDQ Case Of 60


$107.04


Countertop display includes number candles ranging from 0-9. Color: Pink. 60 candles per display.

number birthday candle 60pdq - Case of 60


number birthday candle 60pdq – Case of 60


$72.24


Being in the dollar merchandise business since its beginning, we know what sells, and we are always adding new and different items to our inventory. We are always looking for new items, and we have recently added pet items and craft supplies to our catalog. We design all of the packaging for our items to ensure that categories of merchandise have cohesive matching packaging, and that they are appealing to the eye. number birthday candle 60pdq



 Jonathan Winters: Birth Of A Comic Genius


Jonathan Winters: Birth Of A Comic Genius


$6.11


From his early breakthrough as a regular on the NBC Comedy Hour, to his prolific work on Steve Allen, Dinah Shore and Jack Paar shows, to finally getting his own, short-lived series, Jonathan Winters reinvented the concept of “live” comedy. This collection includes all his greatest moments, both scripted and ad-libbed: “Siamese Twins” with Mickey Rooney, His famous “Wagon Train” sketch, “Maude Frikert’s 100th Birthday Party” with Art Carney, Behind-the-Scenes on his appearance in a “Bob’s Big Boy” commercial, and “Pass the Line” – A ridiculous quiz show on which Jonathan makes one of his first appearances. Siamese Twins with Mickey Rooney, Wagon Train sketch, Maude Frickert’s 100th birthday party with Art Carney; possibly the longest improv in TV history, Behind the scenes on Big Boy commercial: Between takes, Jonathan shmoozes the crew and jokes about his time in the nuthouse (late 60′s, color), Pass the Line (1953) in one of his first on-screen appearances, Jonathan is the head panelist on this, the most absurd and ridiculous quiz (?) show of all time. Some Scenes Presented in Black & White.

 What You Don't Know About Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


What You Don’t Know About Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


$1.99


What You Don’t Know About Turning 60 is a hilarious pop quiz to ease the pain of a 60th birthday. This charming humor book provides entertainment for over-the-hill birthday parties and is fun to read when the party’s over and reality sets in. Sample jokes include:- Q: What’s a senior screwdriver? A: Orange Juice and Metamucil- Q: What do the following words bring to mind: “free refills?” A: If you said coffee, you’re probably under 60. If you said a good prescription drug plan, you’re probably 60 or older.

 What You Don't Know About Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


What You Don’t Know About Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


$4.67


What You Don’t Know About Turning 60 is a hilarious pop quiz to ease the pain of a 60th birthday. This charming humor book provides entertainment for over-the-hill birthday parties and is fun to read when the party’s over and reality sets in. Sample jokes include: – Q: What’s a senior screwdriver? A: Orange Juice and Metamucil. – Q: What do the following words bring to mind: “free refills?” A: If you said coffee, you’re probably under 60. If you said a good prescription drug plan, you’re probably 60 or older.

 What You Don't Know about Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


What You Don’t Know about Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


$4.9


Used – This hilarious, irreverent guide to turning 50 provides 101 jokes to initiatethe beginning old-timer. Cartoons.

 What You Don't Know about Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


What You Don’t Know about Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


$6.99


New – This hilarious, irreverent guide to turning 50 provides 101 jokes to initiatethe beginning old-timer. Cartoons.

 What You Don't Know about Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


What You Don’t Know about Turning 60: A Funny Birthday Quiz


$3.32


New – This hilarious, irreverent guide to turning 50 provides 101 jokes to initiatethe beginning old-timer. Cartoons.

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